Devastated

Today has been a quite horrible day. Mornings are never a good part of the day anyway, but when you are awoken as I was things go from bad to worse. First off I'm sick...I knew I was coming down with something yesterday and today I woke up with a sore throat. Second, how I was awoken...my phone rang it was my mum...a good thing usually...at 8:30am a bad thing...I knew it was bad news. The barn where I had once boarded my horse had burnt down. Eight horses were lost, most of whom I'd grown up around. The imagination I've been blessed with is a curse today because I can hear them screaming and yes, horses scream or rather it's a high pitched whinny. I also have an image of a certain draft horse and another quarter horse and now another and another trying to get out of their stalls and slowly burning to death. I'm going with the hopes that the smoke got to them first, but it was a barn with hay and wood so it went up fast. God!!!!! I just need to get the images out of my head and hopefully writing of them will get them partially out...I don't think they will simply go away. I know four of the horses that were probably in there.

First there was Zeus a Belgian Draft who once was a carriage horse up at the Mount Washington Hotel. Over 18 Hands tall, creamy tan and white with adorably long lashes. One of his feet were the size of my head, he was a big boy, but incredibly gentle. He didn't care for my little Arab...I don't know if it was his black coloring or his size, but I can remember falling off once on a trail ride because Zeus chased after my horse.

Then there is Cowboy, a big baby to the end. He was a chestnut color with a big old white stripe down his forehead. He was a goof ball, always injuring himself and getting stitches on his nose or bombing through a fence because he was jealous the other horses were being ridden and not him. Or I remember a time he locked me in a barn...that was a trip, lol. My friend and I were in there for a half-hour. He was a beautiful animal...and all decked out for shows he was a prime piece.

Then there was Miss Lucy...I'm not sure if she was in the fire or not to be honest, but I'm thinking she probably was. She was a baby when we first met, but grew up as all babies do. She was a buckskin quarter horse just like her mum. Before she learned her manners she was quite the handful. I was taking care of the barn or maybe just helping Amy out one day and I was leading Lucy into the barn for her dinner. She had this trick where she'd put her head down like she was going to grab some grass and then snap up and try to take the lead from your hands. The smart person would either be ready for this or let go...but not me, she must have dragged me for 15 ft. before I let go. She grew into a tall gorgeous girl though.

Then there was the handsome bay Scotty...another one I'm not positive was in the barn fire, but again most likely. He was another gentle giant. A Quarter horse so not as big as Zeus of course, but still a big boy like Cowboy. And it really was his gentle nature I remember the most. You could see it in his eyes. He was gentle with humans, but agressive in the pasture, I think he took more than a few nips out of my Blackstar's rump to show who's boss, but that's the way of all animals I think even humans we just use words.

These horses will all be remembered...they touched many lives...were part of many families...were very much loved. It's funny how these creatures who normally live only 25-30 years normally and in this case much shorter than that touch our hearts. It seems to rip it out when they pass away. I'm sure Amy and Dana and the girls are heartbroken, I think they'd sooner have had an arm cut off then lose those animals. I'd be willing to give up one of mine to bring them back and they aren't even my horses. Fire is such a violent creature in itself and animals so helpless at times like babies. I don't really know how to end this blog....I have a feeling that I'm going to have another cry over this when this is through. I'm not a crier normally, but I sobbed. Loss of ones love ones in such a manner is horrible. I'm quite simply...Devastated.